No, no, of course not, pretension is for other people. Haven't got time for that.

[ Please. He's an alien who unironically dresses himself like a literature professor from the early 1900s because he's got a funny idea about 'cool'. He wouldn't know pretentious if it punched him in the face.

But more importantly: machine guns? What? Who is this man, anyway? ]

You're not hiding some machine gun beneath your coats or your knickers now, are you?