( text | un: butcher )

[cheapbastard]

yeah, all right, i'm new here. please send your welcome wagon baskets of cookies to my room. i'm hungry.

( but that wasn't the reason he was putting himself out there now. he didn't really want to talk to this lot but seems like that was gonna have to be something he does.

so, he's making it happen. )

what i'm gettin from this place is that i can't go back to where i was, this place is in fuckin' space and those are actual fuckin' stars out there, and you lot like to get fucked up drunk sometimes.

( yes, he'd seen that post of yours, newton. seen it and he was going to remember it for the rest of his life. )

so, since you lot are so ready to offer up advice, i got two things:

one, where can i get a fuckin' good drink?
two, where can i punch the shit out of something? or someone. volunteers? i'm definitely taking volunteers. come on, everyone's so helpful here, right?

Comments

[cheapbastard]

barter with me?
really now
what makes you think i wouldn't just take it?

[shadysided]

Because I'll more than happily smash it on the ground in front of you if you try.

It'd be cathartic, even.

[cheapbastard]

you're a little shit, ain't you?

[shadysided]

Sure am.

Guess that makes you a big shit, right?

[cheapbastard]

oh i'm definitely a big shit
the biggest.

[shadysided]

Well, hopefully you'll fit right in here.

I'm sure there's plenty of assholes around you can relate to.

[cheapbastard]

seems like i found one right here

[shadysided]

Wow, what a nice club.
SO happy to be a member.

[cheapbastard]

hey, you can even be the fuckin vice president if you want
i'm very giving

[shadysided]

Gee, thanks. Don't think that means any booze I find will be free, though old man.

Or I'm assuming your old.

Only old people and serial killers from movies use names like 'Butcher'.

[cheapbastard]

it's my fuckin' last name
legitimately
you makin' fun of my name?

[shadysided]

Depends, are you someone who gets super bent out of shape about that kind of thing?

[cheapbastard]

nah.
i'll just think you're very wrong.

[shadysided]

In that case, yes, I'm making fun of your name.

[cheapbastard]

and i think you're very wrong
extremely wrong
what's your name, then?

[shadysided]

Christine.
But that's a boring name, and everyone outside of old, boring teachers call me Ziggy.

[cheapbastard]

ziggy, huh
how'd you get that outta christine?

( was he going to call her christine for making fun of his name? maybe. )

[shadysided]

Because of David Bowie. Ziggy Stardust, you know?

I'm a pale redhead, so someone called me Ziggy, and it just kind of stuck.

[cheapbastard]

right, got it now.
ginger, huh?
haven't met many of those in my life

[shadysided]

We're a rare breed.

Unfortunately, someone spread the word through the neighborhood that 'redheads were witches back in the olden days!'. So I'm also apparently a witch.

Go figure.

[cheapbastard]

oh, that just makes you more interesting
cursed anyone lately?

[shadysided]

No.
I'm not a fucking witch.

And any that feel like cursing people should hang themselves, spare people the trouble.

[cheapbastard]

bummer
would have been the first witch i'd known
but you can still be the ginger in space

[shadysided]

Probably for the best, getting cursed by a witch isn't fun.

But I'll take up the mantle, I guess. Someone has to.

[cheapbastard]

sounds like you've got a bit of familiarity with that
the curse thing