Video | welcome, hallo, buenos días, ohayō, etc, etc! | UN: Newt

[groupiedrifter]

[Newt comes shuffling into view on the screen, holding a cup of coffee in his hand with a bag of what seems to be Sour Patch Kids harrowingly hanging out from beneath the pinky finger of the very same hand. Disheveled but more than happy to provide his services after dragging himself out of bed, he taps his knuckle on the chalkboard beside him — one that used to be Hermann Gottlieb's, may he rest in peace (in a not dead way — may he rest in peace on a beach or something while wholly alive and thriving).]

Noticed an influx of new and kinda-new faces over the last few days or weeks or whatever.

So here's my handy dandy welcome board! Recently updated, to keep with the times.

Read it over and get a feel for how this place goes; I'm gonna finish off this coffee before I take any questions.

[As he takes the world's most obnoxious-sounding sip and burns his tongue, here's the board in question:]



[And then, after a bit of time, he turns the board over to the other side:]



[No worries, current crew, if you can't get one of those introduction papers in person!

Because he's attached them in file format, too.]



[And in case you wanted a text format copy:

Name:
Age:
Birthday:
Favorite color:
Favorite food:
Favorite subject:
Favorite toy:
Favorite animal:
Favorite candy:
Favorite activity:
Favorite place:
Favorite book:
Favorite TV show:
Favorite movie:
I am good at:
I want to learn:
Least favorite subject:
Place I want to go:
If I could make one wish, it would be:
If I could have one superpower, it would be:
This is what I want my teacher to know about me:

(Have at it — threadjacking is encouraged).]

Comments

[deferences]

[wowow not intentionally!? he's only being truthful here, okay! and if it happens to stab wei wuxian right in the heart, well, it's obviously just an unforeseen casualty, given the circumstances. (and is it really so bad that cuteness was what destroyed the fearsome yiling laozu in the end?)]

I'm being sincere, I don't think there is one! Unless... [hmmm. let him think harder on this and—] Wait, do the required handstands count?

[singlelogbridge]

[Child???]

NO! You don't get to count punishment as a subject!

[deferences]

[w h a t]

They aren't always for punishment! There are required handstands and then there are punishment handstands. [which are two totally different things, okay!!!]

1/2

[singlelogbridge]

[This blasphemy from his own flesh and blood, this child that he gave birth to. The betrayal]

[singlelogbridge]

the handstands don't count

[deferences]

[why are you such a drama queen, wei wuxian???]


Then I have nothing! Is it really so bad that I like learning?

[singlelogbridge]

[Trauma response, probably 😌]

Yes! [Wait.] No! It's terrible that you like school. They don't even teach to challenge you, it's all "memorize this" and "repeat that."

[deferences]

[asdfghjkl well, quit that???]

Some things need memorizing and repeating. [this way, history doesn't repeat itself, so on and so forth— but sizhui probably shouldn't mention that because. obvious reasons.] There's no school here now, though, right? Why don't you teach me something instead and prove how much better you are, hm?

[singlelogbridge]

some things, sure. Certainly not everything they tried to teach me. The one who succeeds becomes a noble; the one who fails becomes a bandit hmm? [Because he knows how the great sects work and he knows thy sure as hell aren't going to be honest about the past or the histories that they teach. He's sure that even the righteous Lan don't tell the real story of the slaughter of the innocent Dafan Wen.]

And I accept this challenge, little radish! I'll show you that practical application is much better than memorization and lecture!

[deferences]

Not everything. Did I say that? If so, that's my mistake. [‘now that things have reached this point, i only wish to die quickly.’ hopefully that holds less meaning than what wei wuxian said before... as for what history he knows? well, if he wants the whole truth, he can ask wei wuxian now, can't he?]

Perfect! I'm looking forward to my first lesson, I'll be sure to wake you bright and early tomorrow!

[singlelogbridge]

[Wow. WOW. Who taught you to be so crafty, Sizhui?]

Aiya, who said anything about early? I didn't say anything about early! Besides, I need time to come up with a lesson, don't I? It was a good Lan try though.

[deferences]

[only learned from the best, obviously!]

Because if we start early, we have all day for lessons, of course! But you do have a point; you'll need time to come up with something... so, what about the day after tomorrow?

[singlelogbridge]

The day after next at 10. I'll see you then, Radish!

[It was a nice effort Sizhui. It isn't his fault you wake up at 5AM.]

[deferences]

Aiyah, so much preparation time! But yes, I'll see you the day after tomorrow, Xian-gege.

[no, but it's definitely his fault he sleeps in so long! it's fine, sizhui will occupy his time with something else then meet up with wei wuxian at the given time, regardless.]