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Entry tags:
- altered carbon: takeshi kovacs,
- doctor who: clara oswald,
- knives out: marta cabrera,
- mcu: erik stevens,
- mcu: peter quill,
- one piece: rosinante donquixote,
- pacific rim: newton geiszler,
- pacific rim: raleigh becket,
- star trek aos: leonard mccoy,
- the 100: clarke griffin,
- the old guard: andromache,
- transformers: megatron
text | un: m.cabrera
[ turns out? space doesn't give a single fuck about your circadian rhythm. or maybe insomnia is just that attached to her that even the absence of a sun dictating her internal clock doesn't faze it, like an old friend you wish would just forget you already.
one night (?) late into the early hours (???) marta finds herself drifting out of the room she's come to assume will be hers for the indefinite future, passing through stark white walls with all the sterility of a hospital, but none of its familiar chaos.
she's still getting used to the earpiece. still getting used to hearing other people's voices in her head. she doesn't mean to add another in the void, but one of her own thoughts blares out too vividly as she stares out into an actual void: ]
—but where are the stars?
one night (?) late into the early hours (???) marta finds herself drifting out of the room she's come to assume will be hers for the indefinite future, passing through stark white walls with all the sterility of a hospital, but none of its familiar chaos.
she's still getting used to the earpiece. still getting used to hearing other people's voices in her head. she doesn't mean to add another in the void, but one of her own thoughts blares out too vividly as she stares out into an actual void: ]
—but where are the stars?
text; un: kovacs
Could be far enough out that they don't exist here.
A few billion light years off from the nearest.
no subject
Is that how space works?
I've only ever seen it in TV. Movies.
Out in the country, you see so many stars so close together, I guess it never hit me that they could be so lonely.
[ —that's. that's not what she meant to say. ]
...far apart. I didn't realize they could be so far apart.
no subject
Don't usually hear people concerned about lonely stars.
[ yeah, he caught that. not a great save, marta. ]
Space travel tends to advance pretty rapidly over the years, depending on when you're from. Ending up isolated from clusters of planets and starts seems plenty likely.
Especially if we're supposed to be holding these orbs hostage.
no subject
Hostage?
[ orbs? ]
So... when that voice asked if we were willing to do "anything"...
no subject
[ oh, how he remembers the days. popping in and not have the clearest memory of what the fuck he signed up for. ]
I'm not really the manual book guy around here, but the short of it is that, yeah, you made a deal with the orbs to help them get their shit back together or something and we bring them back here to this station where they're locked up to keep from doing more damage, while we sit around for weeks in between waiting for mission after mission.
[ a+ newbie pep talk. ]
no subject
This happens a lot.
New people coming in. Not knowing.
no subject
[ but the way she says it — yeah, there's probably plenty of concern for their questionable methods in getting people to agree to the deal in the first place. ]
But yeah. Every month or two.
You're just the latest fresh meat.
no subject
I don't know what they were thinking I could do to help, whoever spoke to me.
[ somehow, her heavy sigh doesn't translate itself into text. maybe sleep's finally calling to her, or something like it, because she's starting to lose her hold on her thoughts— ]
I need coffee.
Or a drink.
no subject
[ it's actually something he'd spoken to shaun about; they might've all made deals to be here, but there's no real consistency as to why certain people were chosen, considering the range of skills is all the place. ]
Not sure about the coffee, but I got a whiskey bottle for a warm welcome.
no subject
[ the wry thought slips out in text before she even finishes thinking it, how does it do that. ]
Nurse, I'm a nurse.
[ she had more or less been kidding about the drink, but now she's wondering if it wouldn't be the thing to do at this point. she's in fucking space.
fresh meat. ]
If you don't mind parting with it... I can owe you.
no subject
[ not the nurse part. murder solving. he's not sure how the hell those tie in together, but, well — he was off solving a murder too before he showed up here. ]
But this place could use a nurse.
Right now, we just got quack doctors bandaging up wounds with candy wrappers and thread.
Careful with the old man with the crazy brows.
[ too late. ]
And who said anything about parting with it? Meet me in the mess hall and I'll pour you a glass.
no subject
It was mostly an accident. And a long story.
[ the kind befitting one of harlan's own novels. she still hasn't herself to laugh over the irony just yet. ]
Right.
Sorry.
[ the apology is reflexive; as was the assumption this wouldn't be a social thing. perhaps of all the things she would struggle to get used to, it's that — there are people here in more or less the same boat as her. for better or worse, they're in it together so... so it only makes sense to get to know them.
that being said— ]
You were joking about the candy wrappers, right?
no subject
[ yeah, the "here's to hoping we don't get any murderers on the secluded space station" outlook is a really comforting one to propel on a newcomer. he did say he wasn't equipped to be the welcome wagon. ]
I'll be in mess hall.
[ what he probably should have comforted on is giving an answer about the candy wrappers, right?
but if she does end up going to the mess hall, he could probably be easily spotted as likely the only person there, a tall, built man crammed on a seat with a bottle of whiskey and two glasses on the table in front of him, already pouring into one, lit cigarette with a wisp of smoke peeking from his mouth. ]
--> i have no more clever way to say action so action it is
her steps are quiet, even with the rubber of her sneakers against the pristine white floor. she feels a little bad tracking some mud into it, but with nothing else to do but wander, what did her hosts really expect? kovacs stands out like a beacon in the space, looming even as he sits, the wisps of smoke wafting up from his lips a second signal to capture her attention.
she clears her throat before stepping up towards him, having come from behind. ]
Kovacs?
no subject
he isn't primed to be the most socially welcoming conversationalist but at the very least, he doesn't mind company while he has a drink and based on her questions all hinting at concern for her fresh arrival here, she could probably use one.
when she speaks out, he turns his head, giving her a look as he inhales from the stick in his smoke, pulling it out to blow out a small cloud of smoke from his lips. ]
That's me. Cabrera? [ he gives a vague gesture with his hand to the seat across from him before he grabs the bottle to begin filling up the second glass. ] Grab a drink.
no subject
that said, it's nice to be able to have a proper name to work with off the bat. ]
Marta. [ she's not cool enough to go by her last name, kovacs.
a polite thank you is murmured before she takes the seat opposite him, and though she hadn't been looking for a drink before all this, the night's long hours have finally begun to wear on her and with nothing else to do, with not even the stars to ground her anymore, a drink seems like a pretty good consolation prize.
(though if she were to be completely honest, it's the company that she yearns for more.)
seat taken, drink poured. marta cradles the glass in her hand for a long, contemplative second before her grip on it tightens, and she's lifting it towards him in a toast. ]
Salud.
[ and then she's tipping her head back to toss the glass' contents like the shot it wasn't meant to be, keeping her eyes closed and her lips pursed the entire time the liquid burns itself down her throat, past her ribs before settling deeply into her gut. the medical professional part of her brain reminds her she hadn't had anything substantial to eat since waking that day, but the other parts of her brain that is still working to process the day itself says that first part can gently kiss her ass. ]
no subject
her quiet nerves seems to easily suggest she's new as if he hadn't already concluded that, but it's when she suddenly downs the entire glass in one swift toss that it becomes even more inevitable that she's likely trying to keep herself together tonight.
maybe the prospect of space is too much for her, or maybe she's already regretting whatever deal she's made. he's had the latter thoughts himself. ]
Might wanna slow it down there, Marta. Only got limited stock on the hard stuff until next supply drop.
[ he doesn't seem to actually be judging her though, since he's already tipping the bottle again to fill up her glass again. considering his own usual whiskey intake, he welcomes her to as much as she needs. ]
Rough first day?
no subject
[ her smile is wry, and just a little bit bashful as a result of her over-eagerness. even though his words seem to be in gentle teasing, she does make a dedicated effort to nurse the next one, simply curling her hands around the refilled glass instead of immediately tossing it back. though trust that the urge is there.
she takes in a deep breath, lets it out in a quiet, measured sigh. ]
Last night I went to sleep and talked to a voice in my dreams. [ she looks up from the amber liquid to glance around her, like she hasn't already done that a thousand times that day, like she's still anywhere closer to believing it. ] Tonight I'm here. In space.
[ there's a pause, and then her gaze drops down to kovacs. there's a slight furrow in her brow, almost guilty. ]
But I guess that's everyone's story.
no subject
of course, he'd understood later it was all just in his head, just like all of his routine hallucinations, the past still swirling to haunt him even now, months after the side effects should have gone away.
he gives a shrug when she seems uncertain about her own discomfort on the situation compared to everyone else's. ]
Everyone feels different about it. We all got different stories, different experience — for some people, it's a cake walk through just another day; for others, it's gonna be a hell of a lot.
[ he can tell which camp she's in. ]
You'll be disoriented about it for a while, but the deal you made becomes clearer. And when it does, you can still decide if this is something you really want to do. Some people do leave. [ he looks at the liquid in his glass, tilting it to let it swirl around. ] You don't actually have to do this. Not unless it's really worth it.
no subject
even now, overwhelmed as she is, lost as she feels, the idea of taking it back and rescinding an offer that still seems too good to be true feels not only foolish, but self-destructive. if she feels this badly now, how much more terrible would she feel going home knowing she let an opportunity to save her friend go to waste? ]
I have to believe it is.
[ and that's just it, plain and simple. for harlan, for her.
she lifts her glass towards him, but doesn't tip it back just yet. putting on a brave smile, forcing some life back into the exhaustion on the lines of her face. ]
What should we toast on?
no subject
marta seems like she's concerned, but her voice shows her conviction all the same. he doesn't know what she's bargaining for, but he hopes she doesn't end up disappointed.
he huffs a light chuckle at her sudden shift towards positivity, even if he can feel it subtly forced. but he'll indulge her on it, raising his own glass towards her. ]
Here's to surviving this shit. [ positivity, right? ] And your first night out in space.
no subject
To surviving.
[ taking his words, making it into something a little less resigned and into something a little more congratulatory. not a let's hope we can do it but a we've done it so far, we'll keep doing it till we can't.
she reaches across the table, clinking his glass with hers. ]
Salud.