video; un: rita.farr — aka SUPERHERO CODENAME ASSIGNMENTS

[farr]

[ of course, rita sets up a visual because the starlet always wants to be seen (except when she doesn't). at the present time, she seems rather enthusiastic like she's fighting a proud grin, one that suggests she's ready to give herself a pat on the back at any moment. ]

Good evening, everyone! For those who don't know me, I am Rita Farr, your Team Morale Coordinator.

[ wait, who assigned her that position? ]

As you all well know, we have been joining mission after mission with the intention of collecting orbs to protect the world and save towns from devastation. In a way, you might say we're ... space-travelling superheroes!

And as any superhero would tell you, it's very important to have codenames for our mission. Obviously, we often obtain our very own undercover civilian names. But in the line of duty, when we're in the heat of the fight, we should just as well have assigned titles to continue preserving our identities.

As the Ximilia's Team Morale Coordinator — [ again, who voted her into that position? ] I took it upon myself to select carefully crafted codenames for each and every one of you.

[ she then holds up a sheet of paper, featuring a list of all of the orbers, each with another name printed beside them. ]

You will find this list posted in the Mess Hall. Please take a moment at your best convenience to study the list and memorize each of the names listed for future use. Though I worked very hard to select them — [ she clears her throat, brushing her hair back. ] I suppose that if you have any issue with the name chosen for you, we can discuss making possible changes. Though I don't see why anyone would want to.


XIMILIA'S SUPERHERO CODENAME CHECKLIST:

Clarke — VINCENT VAN GIRL Finn — BEAR BOY Kovacs — BLACK LUNG Dante — PIZZA HUT Rita — ELASTI-WOMAN Chuuta — BEATS Ziggy — STARDUST Dimitri — BREAD MAN Yuri — SIR SECRET Kazuma — SWASHBUCKLER Ryunosuke — SWORDMASTERSITTER Yujin — STACHE DADDY Alina — SUNSHINE Aleksander — SHADOW Mal — GUNSHOW Yzak — SIA Helen — BELLE Marta — LOTUS Joel — TIMESTOPPER Daisy — SHAKE SENORA Natasha — JANE FONDA Shaun — BANGLE BABE Yelena — NIGHT VISION

Gwen — DRUMSTICKS Itachi — PUZZLER DOGSHIT MCGIVENS Andy — ATHENA Joe — ADONIS Sabriel — MYSTIC MAGIC Joric — MR BEAD Newt — MONSTER MASH Felix — ARMORMAN Dr. McCoy — DR SPACE Cassian — INCOGNITO Jyn — CAUTIONETTE Steve — BOMBER KID Dean — KANSAS Lúthien — SIREN Minimus — ROBOFOX Rodimus — ROBOROD Nie Huaising — FAN MAN Wei Wuxian — MR FLUTE Rand — ROBIN HOOD Yennefer — VIOLET Zhao — CHEF BANDIT Viveca — VIXEN Degar — WONDERWALL

( please note that none of the above is to be taken seriously and is in good fun! though rita very much likes to believe she has team leader qualifications and is entirely in her right to make assignments. but she's very bad at selecting names so if some of it seems nonsensical, it's on brand. she went by what she knows or assumes or whatever she likes. )

Comments

audio; un: felix

[swordandshield]

Absolutely not. I am not joining the ranks of 'Locus' and 'Sharkface' in the department of shitty names thank you very much. [Also, he is anything but a superhero... not that anyone needs to really know that.]


Besides, I already have a codename.

[farr]

Well, obviously those are terrible. I'd have come up with something much more original than that.

[ because her list is clearly exploding with originality. ]

But if you already have one, feel free to share with the class and I'll let you know if it's deemed appropriate.

[ rita has final say on official name status, of course. ]

[swordandshield]

Well, at least there's something we can agree on.

[Just not the original part because clearly these names are...not.]

Everyone's already using it.

[farr]

[ it takes her a minute, wondering if she's missed something, before — ]

You're saying Felix is your codename? Isn't that just a regular name?

[swordandshield]

And that's my point! What's wrong with a regular sounding name? It's perfect. No one knows the difference, it's easy to remember, and it doesn't sound like a stupid Batman villain name.

[This. this is an issue that's come up before in the past. He thinks it makes him sound like less a crazy psychopath than certain other people he knows. What is wrong with having a normal name? He'd really like to know, thanks dumbass partners of his past life.]

[farr]

Ha!

[ okay, well, that she gets, since batman does happen to actually exist in her world. ]

They do sound pretty stupid, don't they? It makes me feel all the luckier that I don't like in Gotham. The crime rates over there are absurd. Not that Cloverton is much better with — [ she makes a disappointed note, reminded of some of the villains she's had to encounter. ] The Beard Hunter.

[ so gross. ]

I guess that makes sense. Even if it is a bit misleading. But you're the first to have something of a stage name instead of a code name, so I can't really criticize.

[swordandshield]

[He's two seconds away from agreeing on how stupid comic book villain names sound when she goes a little further. Wait, what. He would ignore it except then that last item--]

The...Beard Hunter. Seriously? [That is the worst name he has ever heard and he will tell Sharkface he's (not at all) sorry the moment he (never) sees the guy again.] That is so absurd! Why would anyone even!?

[As for that last part about his own codename... he's not sure whether he wants to reply or not. A stage name, huh? Maybe there towards the end he could say it was. He had put on quite the act!]

Hmm. It started off a codename, sweetheart. Let's just call it what it is. I'm a mercenary, not a performer.